My Husband Is No Longer The Man I Married

My Husband Is No Longer The Man I Married

My husband is pretty much a regular guy.  He works, helps take care of the little people, enjoys the outdoors and loves a good hot plate.  His sense of humor can run the gambit of a Family Guy episode but he can be just as serious when the situation calls for it. He has a unique world perspective because of his background as a military kid having lived all over the world and as a person of mixed race. I will say he has some pretty good qualities about him. So much so, I once looked at him as someone far superior than anyone I had ever dated and kind of even myself in some ways. But over time, particularly over the last year, I've come to realize, he's not so extraordinary. Let me explain.

Read More

On Charlottesville and what comes next

On Charlottesville and what comes next

Saturday, August 12, in Charlottesville, VA, a white nationalist group, Unite the Right, exercised their right to protest the renaming of Emancipation Park from Robert E. Lee along with the removal of the Robert E. Lee Statue. 

Protesters arrived as early as 8AM. 

Counter-protesters arrived against the direction of Governor Terry McAuliffe who urged, "...Virginians, no matter how well-meaning, elect to stay away from the areas where this rally will take place."

Before noon, due to increasing violence, Governor Mcauliffe declares a state of emergency after law enforcement declared the gathering unlawful. 

Shortly after 1PM, James Alex Fields, Jr., a protestor from Ohio rams his vehicle into a crowd of counter-protestors killing 32 year old Heather Heyer and injuring 19 others. He's currently charged with 2nd degree murder. 

Heather Heyer's final public Facebook post read, "If you're not outraged, you're not paying attention."

Read More

I'm not a writer by any means, but these are the three main reasons I write

I'm not a writer by any means, but these are the three main reasons I write

In no world where the internet doesn't exist where any human privileged enough to have access to wi-fi and products designed by Steve Jobs, and can self publish their elementary ramblings to the world, would I be considered a writer. 

But that's not the world we live in. And people pay me to write the thoughts in my head on the internet. So I've been criticized as a writer, but that would be unfair to every human who's taken the craft of scribing words serious enough to study and practice getting better at it. 

Because my writing style is more or less, get lost in my feelings about some subject, smoke marijuana, and spew it all out - guts and all - unfiltered, in one long rambling medicated rant that only makes sense to myself at the time, but almost always leads me to shame if I dare to go back and read my own thoughts aloud. 

Read More

People don't wanna hear good news, and that's a damn shame because sh*t is awesome for me right now

People don't wanna hear good news, and that's a damn shame because sh*t is awesome for me right now

I just had a daughter. She's five months old, and the best thing ever. Sure, she cries and shits and won't let her mother and I get full night's sleep - seriously, it's been 5 months since we've had a full night's sleep - but she's simply the best thing ever. She recognizes me with a smile each and every time. A huge toothless smile. All gums. All genuine. I dare you to name one person or even animal in your life that recognizes you with a huge genuine smile that says, "I'm actually really happy to see your face right now." If you can, you're already richer than most billionaires. Now imagine that person is your own flesh and blood? Now imagine you know that joy is temporary because babies grow the fuck up. So I savor every smile, multiple times per day, for as many days she's willing to bless me with them. 

Read More

I Just Wanna Sleep!!!

I Just Wanna Sleep!!!

Third night, fourth night. I really don't know anymore. I've lost count. All I know is that my sanity has left the building. I'm exhausted and angry. I'm tired of spending my nights here with you on our couch. I'm supposed to be in my bed and you in yours. But you seem to have another agenda. One of which I have yet to become aware. These last few nights have been worse than other nights previously and we're only 4 weeks in. The thought of you teething, another growth spurt, the 4 month sleep regression all scare me.

Read More